


Two Halves of a Perfect Whole

by Reiven



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: Eventual Happy Ending, F/M, Future Fic, post 4.10
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-10
Updated: 2017-07-10
Packaged: 2018-11-30 10:47:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11462004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reiven/pseuds/Reiven
Summary: Eva and Chris made a promise just before Chris left for the army, to meet once a year at the same spot on the same day until the day would come that they either fall in love with other people, or they fall in love with each other.Every year, until their time runs out. Eventually, it does.[Post 4.10/Future fic]





	Two Halves of a Perfect Whole

**Author's Note:**

> Dedicated to giishere and the lovely anon who requested the fic and whose idea coincided with mine and the millions and millions of the still hurt, but nowadays mostly bitter Chriseva fans who will never find canon peace for our favourite characters and our favourite OTP.

Eva went to Sana’s Eid party with Chris but they left separately. It wasn’t really a surprising turn of events; deep down it was a scenario Eva was kind of expecting even if she herself hadn’t realized it at the time. She knew it was going to happen eventually and she thought being proven right would give her a sense of validation, but instead she was just left with a strange feeling deep inside her gut that she couldn’t explain. It couldn’t have anything to do with Chris, could it?

Instead, she found herself walking home that night with Jonas. The bitter part of Eva nearly laughed at the irony, but the present Eva was still lost in the euphoria of everything.

She’d been proven right by Chris that he was still a fuckboy and he was obviously not ready to settle down with her or anyone at that point in time. She laughed then and she’s still laughing a little on the inside, but deep down, strange feelings were lingering in the corner of her spirit like an itch that just wouldn’t go away, and a sense of hurt that she never wanted to experience again. Mostly she was disappointed that she put herself in that position again.

She feels Jonas’s warm hands slip into hers and she turns just in time to see his smiling face gazing down at her. His face is still so comforting in a familiar way and this whole scene is just dripping with bittersweet nostalgia that Eva nearly choked on it.

Jonas moves in to kiss her and she reciprocates. His kiss is forceful and wild; she feels herself subconsciously taking a step back because of Jonas’s body pushing up against her, and she has to catch herself when her heel finds the edge of the curb. Jonas has always been vigorous in his kisses with her, almost like he was marking his territory against other males and claiming her with his lips in a way, instead of being present in the moment with her as he should have been. When they were kissing, Jonas was always subconsciously trying to dominate her, pushing her up against the wall and making her take a step back. It was fun when she was younger, when she still didn’t realize her own worth, when she thought Jonas could do much better and that she was lucky he chose her.

It was different with Chris. For a guy who spends most of his free time hooking up and making out with girls, Chris was surprisingly gentle with his kisses and respectful with his whole body language. Eva never felt dominated when she was kissing Chris. It was never anything that happened consciously but Eva always felt in control when they were together, whether it involved them kissing or having sex. No matter how passionate their kissing moments would be, the second Eva even showed a hint of hesitation or physically pulled back, no matter how miniscule the action would be, Chris would stop immediately. His eyes would find hers as if asking ‘is everything okay’ without him actually saying the words.

When she was kissing Chris, Eva always felt like the dominant one which she hadn’t realized until this moment how much she took that feeling for granted.

“You okay?”

She hears Jonas’s question and comes back to the present just in time to see him pull back, taking a step back to just watch her with a half confused, half amused look.

“I’m okay,” she says. “Just thinking.”

“Well, don’t strain yourself,” Jonas says with a laugh, the words flowing out like it comes absolutely naturally to him and in that moment Eva finally really _looks_ at him.

Her eyes study him up and down intently, concentrating on every part of him like she was picking him apart cell by cell under a microscope; his hair has grown, his face has matured but he’s still _exactly_ the same. The same smile, the same laugh and the same condescending comment said like it is just second nature to him. Perhaps it is.

Eva can’t believe it, somehow she’s found herself in the exact same position she started: with Jonas at her side, making snide comments and belittling her intellect and being so completely nonchalant about it.

She almost can’t find the words when she opens her mouth to speak. “Jonas…I—I…”

“What?”

She steels herself and looks him straight in the eye. “I…I can’t. I’m sorry, but I can’t do this again.”

His eyebrows narrow slightly, not so much in anger, more like he’s trying hard to make sense of the situation. His face stripped of all traces of humour that were there just a second ago. “What do you mean? I thought—”

“I—I know what you thought, and I thought it too, but…this is a mistake. I can’t do this _again_. I just…I just can’t.”

“And you’re telling me this now?” he asks, looking upset and a little angry at the same time, but mostly just confused, probably as confused as Eva feels deep down. “After I let Emma go home with _your_ boyfriend.”

That was the comment that sealed it for Eva; in that moment, she squared her shoulders and took her stand on the ground. “Chris isn’t my boyfriend, but Emma _was_ your girlfriend and you cheated on her with me, just like you cheated on Ingrid with me, just like Chris cheated on Iben with me. Seems like I’m always destined to be the Scarlet Woman no matter what story it is,” she scoffs, more to herself than to anyone else.

“Eva—”

“This was a mistake,” she interrupts quickly. “I’m sorry for leading you on, for being led on by you, but this never should have happened in the first place. I was scared and I ran and somehow I always end up back at the beginning of my tragic story, but not anymore,” she says. “I’m sorry, but it’s over. This…whatever this is—whatever this could be. I can’t put myself in this position again.”

Jonas exhales through his nose, his eyes closed as if in deep thought. “Okay,” he says, and ‘okay’ is the only thing Eva really wanted to hear.

She leaves and she doesn’t look back at Jonas’s form standing under the streetlight watching her receding back disappear in the distance.

Her heart is pounding in her chest but for the first time she finally feels completely free; like whatever spell Jonas had on her is finally truly broken.

Her mom isn’t home so once again she has the whole house completely to herself, but as usual, she finds herself locked away in her room, knees pulled up to her chest on the bed, sulking. Her bed feels strangely empty with just her in it.

The sudden knock at her window is unexpected, and Eva nearly jumps out of her skin when the thumping sound startles her out of her thoughts.

She finds Chris and his grin at the window looking stupidly back at her when she hops off the bed to peek over to see who it is, and Eva isn’t sure if she wants to laugh or punch him out in that moment.

“Evening,” he greets as he slides in with too much stealth and sneakiness than is appropriate for someone coming into a girl's bedroom at night while she’s home alone.

“Evening,” she greets back, walking back over to the bed and taking a seat. “So…”

Chris doesn’t immediately meet her eyes when he enters; he takes his time brushing the dirt off his palms while keeping his back to her, almost like he is as nervous as she is in that moment. “So…”

“How’s Emma?” Eva asks to break the ice and succeeds, because Chris laughs and finally turns to look at her.

“Fine,” he says with a chuckle. “Probably at home sulking,” he adds with a casual shrug. “I dropped her off right after the party and just kind of ended up driving around town by myself.”

“Strange,” Eva says, “that you chose not to go home with your new girlfriend.”

She tries not to make it obvious but she can feel the bitter tone slip out with the words, even though it was completely unintentional.

Chris’ smile drops slightly but doesn’t disappear completely. It was something he did when he knew he’d done something wrong but couldn’t find the words to make an excuse for it. Instead, he walks over to her, his footsteps soundless and Eva scoots over to make room for him to sit down on the edge of the mattress next to her.

There’s an eerie sense of déjà vu about the whole scene in that moment.

“You know, I—I…William was talking about having these _moments_ , like the moment he had when he realized that Noora was the one. I usually don’t listen to him when he gets into his sappy moods like this, but it did get me thinking—don’t worry, I didn’t strain myself—and your name kind of came up in the conversation.”

“Yeah?” she asks, a little surprised.

“Yeah, and uh—I guess…I guess I just got a little confused about everything after that.”

“A state you seem to perpetually be in,” Eva says. It takes her a moment to realize how much she sounded like Jonas in that moment.

Chris didn’t seem to notice, he just chuckled. “That isn’t untrue I guess.”

Eva wants to tell him that it isn’t true at all, but she just keeps silent instead.

“I was just…I guess I was trying to think whether or not we had a moment like that, the two of us, because I couldn’t think of any.”

“Maybe we didn’t have our moment,” Eva says, and she tries not to let the disappointment in her voice be too apparent.

“I was thinking that too, I was also thinking that perhaps we hadn’t had our moment yet,” Chris says, almost like he’d been giving this topic a lot of thought. “But then I realized that we did have our moment, it just happened too long ago that we kind of forgot about it. At least it was a moment for me, I just didn’t realize it at the time.”

That piques Eva’s curiosity and she raises an eyebrow at him.

Chris looks at her with his intent gaze when he speaks again. “That night at the club, when you walked up to me while I was dancing,” he says with a small smile. “I didn’t realize it until just now, especially because everything happened so fast then, what with the mix-up and you storming out and I guess I never gave it too much thought. But I just remembered that the moment I laid eyes on you, my first thought was ‘ _wow’_ ,” he says with a shit eating grin, “ _’Damn_.’”

Eva tries not to smile at that and instead forces herself to look away.

“I thought you just had that with Miss Kosegruppa Yay this evening,” she says lightheartedly. At least it was meant to be lighthearted. “You looked cute together.”

Chris flicks his tongue out of the corner as he studies Eva intently. He doesn’t look amused though, only pensive. “Nothing happened after that though. I drove her back to her house and she invited me in but…but—I don’t know. You know, looking back on it now, the funny thing is, the only thing I can recall when I think about that moment was how much she reminded me of my grandmother.”

Eva splutters out a laugh before she can stop herself. “Your _grandmother_?” she asks, an eyebrow raised skeptically. “You say that to all the girls?”

“Not to you,” he says seriously but doesn’t elaborate. “I made a stupid mistake back there. I thought I was mature enough to settle down with just one girl, but maybe deep down I just wasn’t?”

“I made a mistake too,” Eva admits. “I was scared, in a way, of not being able to give you what you wanted because I didn’t know what _I_ wanted. I guess I was just—falling back on old habits.”

“I get that,” Chris says. “I’m like the epitome of _old habits die hard_.”

“That is true.”

They both laugh at that, but the laughter is easy going despite the topic of conversation. They both lapse into silence as the laughter slowly dies down.

Chris licks his lips once before he speaks again. “My mandatory enlistment ends in a few months and I was actually—uh, I was actually thinking of reenlisting—for real.”

Eva doesn’t know why, but all of a sudden it feels like her heart skipped a beat. There’s no reason for her to feel that way, they aren’t together. Even more than that, whatever might have happened between them was thoroughly extinguished today when he fell for the first pretty face to cross his path and Eva hurtled herself back at Jonas like she tended to do whenever things in her life were becoming too scary and confusing.

“Oh,” she says.

His grin widens when he regards her, leaning back slightly as if taken aback by her disappointed tone. “Why, Miss Eva, are you upset? Are you going to miss me?” he says jokingly, but Eva can see the spark of hope in his eyes when she turns to look at him. He’s masking his real feelings with a joking offhanded comment. It’s a habit he has that she only just now noticed. It seems like they both have their fair share of bad habits that they end up falling back on.

Eva could have said something sarcastic or just laughed it off, but instead she says, “Yes,” and she genuinely means it.

Chris seems like he was expecting her sarcastic comment and her laugh, her genuine confession seems to throw him a little and he adds hesitantly. “I mean…after I enlisted I just felt like—kind of like I finally had a purpose, you know? Like I was drifting around lost this whole time, especially after William fucked off to the British Isles. The whole time I was there though, I couldn’t stop thinking about you,” he admits and this time Eva is the one left gobsmacked. “And then I came back here and still I thought I had everything figured out; that I knew what I wanted, with you and with everything, and then this afternoon happened and just—I guess maybe you were right, maybe I just wasn’t as ready as I thought I was. Maybe I _am_ just a cheating fuck boy.”

It’s the first time Eva’s seen Chris genuinely dejected in the whole time she’s known him, and the sight is rather unnerving.

Eva inhales deeply. “I slept with Jonas,” she said, not allowing her nerves to get the better of her. “It was before the birthday party when I didn’t know whether you were coming or not. I mean—it’s not an excuse or anything like that—we weren’t together, _aren’t_ together and I just lost my head at that moment, and I guess I kind of just… _regressed_ , in a way. Jonas was always easy; he’s a huge asshole, but somehow he’s consistent in his assholery, I guess. If that even makes sense. What happened with you was…I guess it just kind of threw me and I got scared, especially this afternoon at the party, cause I saw you with Emma and I kind of wanted to feel—maybe validation in a way, that I was right this whole time. But I wasn’t, not really, at least not about you. Maybe what happened was because I pushed you to her in the first place.”

“I’m not that easily pushed away though,” he says with a grin, and Eva is glad to see some of the familiar humour returning to his eyes. “As you’ve found out, especially when it’s something I really want.” He bites his lip a little as he musters up what he wanted to say. “And I really wanted you, Eva…or maybe I do want you, but—I guess I just don’t really know exactly what I want right now. I don’t want to be the guy who makes promises he can’t keep, and me as I am right now, I feel like I’m still that person.”

“If you are that person, then I am too,” Eva says. “I’m just…I’m just very confused right now. Not so much about you, but just about me and about what I want and what I need and I feel like until I can figure it out, I don’t think I can really be anyone’s girlfriend and commit to it wholeheartedly. I’ve never really taken any time to just be _Eva_ , you know?”

Chris has a small bittersweet smile on his face when he answers. “I do, more than you think. I feel like I’m still trying to find myself too.”

They both lapse into silence immediately after that, looking at everything and everywhere besides each other; heads bowed low and elbows rested on their knees in mirroring positions. They stay like that for a long while before Chris finally breaks the monotony.

“When…one day maybe, when you’ve finally found Eva and I’ve finally found Chris, maybe—um, maybe we can introduce them to each other then?”

Eva smiles, the first genuine smile she’s had on her face the whole day. “I’d like that a lot.”

“Great,” Chris says.

“August the twenty-fifth,” Eva says suddenly. Chris makes an inquiring noise in the back of his throat encouraging her to continue. “The first time we met,” she says, “In the club that night. It was August the twenty-fifth.”

“You remembered?”

Eva bites the corner of her lip before she answers seriously. “I never forgot.”

Chris’s smile is beaming.

“I was thinking,” he says, wringing his hands in front of him. “My basic training is going to be at least a few more years once I enlist, but I’ll probably get some days off. So I was thinking that maybe we could meet up? Maybe like—set a date, for when we’re free to meet; when you’re free and I’m free and maybe if we’re both still single. We can just show up and see what happens. But like—if the other person isn’t single anymore, they just have to…not show up, and the other person will know that it’s time to move on and that this—“ he motions to the air between them, “—whatever this was, was just not meant to be.”

“Sounds like it would either be a really good idea or a really painful one,” Eva says. “But I like it.”

“You do?”

“Yeah. I actually do,” Eva says. “ _August the twenty-fifth_ ; that’s the date,” she adds, “At the same club, at the same time on the dot. And I have one condition.” That last bit she tacks on with a cheeky grin. “You have to wear the same dumb fedora as that first time we met—every time.”

Chris laughs a boisterous laugh when she finishes. “Okay,” he agrees through the dampness of his eyes from the laughter. “But I have a condition too: if I have to wear the fedora, you have to wear _that_ outfit; the same one you wore that night. The mini skirt with that top.”

This time it’s Eva who bursts into laughter. “Sure, you get the easy thing. What if I don’t fit that outfit anymore years down the line?”

“Hey, you’re the one who made the rules,” he says nonchalantly with a cheeky grin. “You better follow it then. Also, the same make-up too.”

“ _Fine_ ,” she says, putting far too much emphasis on the _f_ in the word. “You’re an asshole.”

“I know,” he says simply.

“When are you leaving? Or, when do you start your basic training?”

“Not for a few months; I’ll probably still be around by this August.”

“Okay,” Eva says.

The silence returns but it’s more comforting than stilted, before Chris gets to his feet. “I should go. I promised to meet William at McDonalds in an hour.”

Eva just nods and gets to her feet as well, walking him back towards the window he’d entered from.

“Well, Eva, it’s been fun…unless you want to have a bit more fun before I leave?”

“Piss off,” she says, but she’s smiling when she smacks him on the arm.

“Say hi to your mom for me.”

“ _Piss off_!” she smacks him harder this time. “You are incorrigible.”

“Hey, parents love me, okay?”

“Shut up and go away.”

He has one foot on the edge of the chair to heave himself up when he turns to her again. “Well, future girlfriend, till we meet again.”

Eva rolls her eyes, trying to look less amused than she feels on the inside. “Till then, boy who is a friend who cannot take no for an answer.”

“I can live with that,” he says.

They share a look with each other for a moment longer before Chris slowly lowers himself to plant a kiss on Eva’s lips and Eva reciprocates easily.

The kiss is short but it gets both their points across and Chris climbs back out the window in the far corner, but doesn’t look back when he leaves, and deep down, Eva is glad he didn’t.

“Till we meet again,” she says to the darkness.

The year that follows passes in the blink of an eye and before Eva realizes it, it’s already the mid afternoon of August the twenty-fifth of the following year. The last time she’d seen Chris was just before he shipped off back to base around the same time last year and besides sparse messages here and there telling her he’s fine and asking about her day and other questions he doesn’t get to know the answer to, Eva hasn’t seen or had any contact with him whatsoever. Being in the actual military was different than the one he’d been in before; even on the rare occasion when he got the weekend off he was usually always too busy settling other businesses to come see her. Eva didn’t take it to heart because she understood and because he always sounded sincere and a little disappointed himself every time he had to tell her he couldn’t come.

But Eva kept waiting. She still hooked up with guys in the backroom at clubs and in the hallway of parties, but none of it ever went anywhere. Or rather she’d stop herself before it could go anywhere. It was a condition Chris had set or made her agree to; he was insistent that she still needed to have her own fun in the meantime.

It was just a condition she’d set for herself: to look and touch, maybe kiss, but nothing more than that. It wasn’t anything exceptionally hard or easy either way, it just didn’t feel like anything she wanted in that moment.

Chris tells her he misses her when he calls and when he can’t he still somehow manages to find a way to send a text usually consisting of a long line of heart emojis and little smileys blowing kisses. Eva tries to not feel too touched by the act, but she fails miserably every time.

She’s pulled the short black skirt from the bottom pile of clothes in her closet and the familiar colourful purple top that held both good and bad memories.

Getting dressed was easy, besides working herself into the pantyhose that all of a sudden seemed way too tight. Luckily Chris hadn’t set the condition that the pantyhose needed to be the same exact one as well. Small favours, Eva thought. Doing her make up-on the other hand, was the worst part. She’d never been especially gifted in that ability, not like Sana, but it’s like her skills only deteriorated over time, or it could have been because of the nerves. She’s never been nervous for anything that was Chris related before, but for some reason today her stomach felt like it was in knots. Her heart was thundering in her chest and her palms felt clammy. It was a strange feeling and not one she’d really associate with anything Chris related but there it is like a symptom she can’t ignore.

She missed him, more than she ever thought she would and even though Chris says the same every time they meet, deep down Eva hopes that he truly means it.

The party is in full swing when she arrives; the music is booming and the sweaty bodies are grinding up against each other in the enclosed space but Eva can only focus on one thing: trying to spot the familiar person with the familiar fedora among the countless bodies in the crowd.

It takes her a full five minutes before a twinge in the back of her mind encourages her to look up at the beam smack dab right in the middle of the room, close to the bar where a line of girls are eyeing a particular person hungrily with their eyes.

Eva steels herself for a moment, putting on the game face she’s perfected in the year that she hasn’t seen him and marches over; not paying attention but completely aware of the glares that are directed towards her by the girls around when she walks straight up to the dancing person in the middle of the dance floor; reaching over to place a hand on his upper arm and leans close to whisper into his ear; “Are you Chris? I need to talk to you for a minute.”

And finally he stops dancing and turns his eyes up to look at her, pushing the fedora higher up his forehead to get a better glimpse.

Eva is momentarily taken aback but she tries not to show it.

Chris looks good; really good.

It isn’t that he’s aged much in the year that passed, but his face has gotten more chiseled, more mature. But the moment he smiles, that’s the moment Eva really recognizes him and all of a sudden he hasn’t aged, not even as single day since the last time she saw him.

“I’m always open to a little discussion,” he says with a grin.

Eva doesn’t wait for a sign or words from up above; she can still feel the heat of the jealous glares boring holes into the back of her skull. She reaches over to cup the side of Chris’s face gently with her palm and leans up on her tiptoes to kiss him square on the lips. She doesn’t have to lean far because Chris bends down to meet her halfway for the kiss. In that moment, with the blood rushing to her head and her cheeks, Eva is suddenly sixteen years old again and she’s kissing the most handsome boy she’s ever laid eyes on.

They find themselves out of the club and all the way across town and at the doorstep of Eva’s house soon enough. Eva is fumbling with the keys even as Chris continues the onslaught of kisses on her shoulder and the back of her neck; his arms trailing across her midsection to grab her firmly in a strong embrace. Somehow he’s gotten bigger and taller since the last time they met; bigger was expected, but the fact that he somehow looks taller is something Eva credits to the way he seems  to hold himself higher, prouder almost, his back straight and his posture almost stern; but nothing about his roaming hands or his lips covering her in fluttering kisses is stern by any definition of the word.

They’re both almost completely undressed by the time they stumble all the way to her room and find themselves in a tangle of limbs and half off pieces of clothing and undergarments, but Eva is laughing and Chris laughs along with her and in that moment, Eva couldn’t ask for anything more perfect.

Chris doesn’t stay for long that morning; just long enough for another make out session in the kitchen over the smell of freshly brewed coffee and fried eggs and melted butter.

Chris says he can’t stay and Eva doesn’t ask him to, but the decision is mutual and Chris plants one last kiss on her lips before he leaves. This time out the front door the way he came in, for the very first time.

Another three hundred and sixty five days pass before she sees him again. She’s turned twenty by that time and feeling so much more mature compared to her sixteen year old self who was so quiet and shy and so concerned about everyone else’s opinion and everyone else’s opinion of her. She doesn’t care about that anymore; she’s proud of the person she turned out to be and everyone around her could see that, even Jonas, who she still passes curtly in the street on her way to the grocery store. But Jonas hasn’t changed at all.

Chris on the other hand has changed so much in the two years since they last had their talk in her bedroom when it was just the two of them. Just a small part of his change was actually physical, most of it was in the way he moved and the way he carried himself; the way he reacted to the people around him, especially to the women. He still looked; from under the brim of the grey fedora while he was moving his body to the music, obviously seeing all the eyes that were on him in that moment and lapping up all the attention proudly.

Eva stands off to the side for a few minutes just watching. Watching him move, watching him dance, just watching _him_ ; watching him in a way that she never watched another person before and thinking that maybe she was actually finally able to see everything about him and that she truly did like what she saw.

Only then does she approach him. She can sense from the way his entire body language changes that he noticed her approach even though his back is to her but he doesn’t turn to greet her until she has her hand on his arm, beckoning him to turn around with a gentle nudge. He obliges loyally with a come-hither smirk. Eva says, as she’d said the year before, “Are you Chris? I need to talk with you,” and he answers with the same answer he’d given back then too, “I’m always open to a little discussion,” he says and they both can’t stop the smile that curls at their lips.

They find themselves back at Eva’s house and in her bed just before the sun begins its ascension in the horizon.

They had a great night; one of the best Eva has ever had, but Chris doesn’t stay that time either and Eva doesn’t even think of asking him to.

Another year brings many more changes to Eva’s life: new living arrangements, a new job; some new coworkers that she makes time for outside the tight knit group of friends she already has.

Sana spent the summer in Turkey with her brother. Everyone who knew her knew that ‘her brother’ was actually code for Yousef, but never actually brought up the topic whenever Sana was in the room.

After almost two years of living with Noora at the Kollektivet after his dad cut him off; William finally managed to get an apartment of his own. It wasn’t at all like the apartment he used to own; it was small and cozy and not unlike the family friendly apartment Noora was used to living in with Eskild and Linn. Noora went with him when he moved but Eskild and Linn didn’t have time to be sad by her departure because almost immediately after she vacated her room—twenty-two hours in fact, they gained a new roommate in the form of one of Elias’s friends, Mutta. He and Eskild got along almost uncomfortably well.

Vilde was still with Magnus and somehow the years that passed had only managed to make them even clingier and even more liberal with the PDA. Eva didn’t mind it though, because seeing the genuinely joyous look on Vilde’s face whenever she looked at Magnus was the only thing that mattered to any of them.

Chris somehow ended up dating Julian Dahl, which came as an absolute shock to everyone because all this time people had assumed he was gay.

Even and Isak, or as Magnus had come to refer to them collectively as Evak, were still disgustingly cute with each other. Eva didn’t contact them as much as she’d like, but last she heard they were in the middle of planning a holiday abroad for just the two of them.

Eva was glad for all her friends for finding their happiness, but deep down there was still a part of her that yearned to have what they had. It was funny, she thought she was over her childish dreams of getting a happily ever after and was more than content to just live life as it came; to hook up with whoever she wanted and to fuck whoever she wanted without apology.

Once upon a time ago, she thought she had that with Jonas, but that dream turned out to be more like a wistful fantasy. Then for a split second she thought that maybe she could have had that with Chris, even though her heart was too battered to truly allow herself that fantasy, but that too had turned out to be a bust. But somehow thoughts of Chris, even now, never left a bitter taste in her mouth or even a sense of loss when she thought about him, maybe because there was never really anything between them to be lost. Or maybe because she doesn’t feel like she’s lost him yet.

She used to want to be with Jonas every second of every minute of every day, but this thing she had with Chris, meeting him only once a year outside the sporadic text and occasional phone calls that come when she least expects it; somehow what she had right now just felt more fulfilling.

Chris never stays past August the twenty-sixth, and Eva never asks him to. It just felt like an unspoken agreement between the two of them that the moment just wasn’t right at the time.

The third year passes the same, so does the fourth and with each passing year the yearning in Eva’s heart grows stronger and stronger until one day, one cold, damp morning; she wakes up just before dawn to the sound of raindrops beating down on her window that she comes to the realization.

She wants him.

She needs him.

She _loves_ him.

She can’t go back to sleep after that revelation and just lays back down in her bed, imagining the feel of Chris’ body embracing her like a fond memory.

It’s August the twenty-fifth, five years after they first made their pact while sitting on the edge of the mattress in her old room and all of a sudden it’s like Eva can finally see the world clearly again.

Today is finally the day and Eva hopes that she isn’t too late.

She takes extra care getting ready that evening; putting greater concentration into doing her make-up, utilizing all the skills she’d picked up through the years; contouring and highlighting and winging her liner to perfection. She curls her hair and uses more hairspray that day than she has in her whole twenty three years of life, watching it cascade down past her shoulders when she lets it out of the rollers. She finishes everything off with a touch of pink lipstick and shimmery pink gloss.

It takes her five minutes of going back and forth before she sets aside the black miniskirt and the flowery top and instead reaches for a skin tight, dark red bandage dress that reaches down to just above her knees and a pair of black pumps. She hopes Chris won’t get mad for her diverting from their promise tonight.

She hopes Chris will still show up.

She studies her reflection one last time in the mirror, smoothing the creases down her front and reaches for her knee length coat and her purse, willing her heart to stop thundering in her chest before she exhales once and leaves her apartment without a look back.

She has so much hope for tonight, the main being that she isn’t too late.

The club hasn’t changed one bit since the first time she stepped in across the threshold all those years ago; back then her outfit was a mess, her makeup was a mess and she herself was a hot mess.

It’s amazing what a difference a few years could do to a person. Eva doesn’t think she’s ever felt this good about herself in her life and maybe that was why it didn’t work out with Jonas and why it didn’t work out with Chris at the time.  She didn’t love herself enough to allow herself to love another person the way they deserved. That was really what got between her and Chris all those years ago, and perhaps she did play her part in pushing him away and into Emma’s arms when he was obviously trying so hard to change.

Inevitably, they were both just not ready for each other back then.

The only question is-is she ready now?

She supposes she is about to find out.

She looks for the familiar fedora among the moving, grinding bodies on the dance floor. Somehow her brain has chosen that exact moment to start replaying Chris’s words over and over in her head.

_‘If the other person isn’t single anymore, they just have to…not show up.’_

It plays on a loop in her mind and she can’t stop the way her heart feels as if it’s dropping deeper and deeper into her stomach with each passing moment she isn’t able to spot him.

Bodies push past her, bumping accidentally into her shoulder as they rush past, whether in a hurry to get somewhere or headed to the bar to get another drink. Eva is stuck on the spot just looking at the people moving around her, it’s like she’s stuck in a slow motion video while everyone else is moving fast forwarded through the scene, but she doesn’t have time to collect her thoughts or even decipher what she’s feeling on the inside. If she has to describe the feeling in a word she would say _crushed_ ; absolutely, devastatingly crushed.

She looks at the hands of her watch showing her that it’s almost thirty past nine. In the few years they’d adhered to their promise, they’ve never met up later than nine o’clock.

_‘If the other person isn’t single anymore, they just have to…not show up.’_

Just the thought of Chris not coming; of Chris potentially not being single anymore; the thought of Chris being in the arms of another woman, someone who isn’t her; kissing her and touching her the way he used to touch her while they were in bed together. The way he used to stroke her eyebrow with his thumb until she woke up, gazing up at his beautiful smiling face looking at her like she was the moon in his eyes.

Eva feels the warm sensation of tears pooling in her eyes, but she doesn’t want to cry. She’d mess up her make-up and she doesn’t want that.

Chris never promised her anything just like she hasn’t promised him anything in return. Everything they had they’d built from nothing _with_ nothing but luck and a feeling of mutual attraction. But a sad fact that Eva is all too used to: eventually your luck is bound to run out.

And it seems like hers finally has.

Eva nearly laughs, except the sound comes out choked and wet, almost like a sob that she was trying hard to suppress.

She doesn’t dare glance at her watch, deep down she knows it’s already close to ten and still Chris is nowhere in sight.

_‘If the other person isn’t single anymore, they just have to…not show up.’_

She tries not to be hurt, but the pain is agonizing inside her chest and deep within her gut and all of a sudden she feels like she can’t breathe. She needs to get out of there. She needs air. She needs…

She needs Chris.

She wants Chris.

She loves Chris.

The crushing sorrow in her heart is agonizing and a person’s hard bump against her shoulder almost sends her sprawling to the ground. Before she can face plant though, a pair of strong arms catches her by the shoulder, steadying her; allowing her to find her feet again before she can straighten up sheepishly to thank him.

“Wow...”

The voice stills her. She can’t peel her eyes away from the ground she’s staring at to look at him because she’s afraid that if she does it’s going to turn out to just be a figment of her deepest desires. She just isn’t ready for the disappointment.

“Damn.”

But there it is again. It’s just a voice, but it isn’t. It’s _the_ voice.

It’s Chris’s voice and Eva dares herself to glance up and see him.

Chris looks…

…breathtaking.

Gone is the stupid grey fedora that she both loved and hated looking at. Gone are the simple t-shirt and the slacks she is so used to seeing him in.

What’s still there, though, is the stupid cheeky grin on his face and the glint in his eyes and the way he looks at her like she’s the only thing in the room worth looking at.

When Eva finally manages to catch her breath and find the legs to steady herself on, she finally looks at him properly.

He’s wearing a pair of dressy black pants with a professional black coat to match over a crisp white button up shirt, the two top buttons left undone. In his hand is the biggest, most flamboyant looking bouquet of flowers Eva has ever seen in her life.

Eva is left speechless and her mind a buzzing mess. Chris still has one hand holding her by the upper arm and the look in his eyes is both amused and appreciative of what he’s looking at.

“I’m sorry I’m late,” he says. “Picking out this outfit took much longer than I thought.”

Eva is still gobsmacked, her mouth opening and closing without actual words coming out to justify the act. “You look…” she manages to choke out.

Chris looks sheepish when he interrupts her. “Dumb, right? I know it looks dumb. I should have gone with the t-shirt and—”

“No. N-No, not at all,” she interrupts quickly. “You look… _amazing_.”

Chris actually blushes before he clears his throat. “Really? I—I mean, _you_ look amazing, Eva. I’m just—I just look like…well, a dude.”

Eva feels tears start to well up in her eyes, but compared to the tears of sadness and disappointment like a few minutes ago, these tears are of relief and amusement and genuine happiness. “Well, you look like a really handsome dude nonetheless.”

Chris smiles and Eva smiles right back at him.

“I’m sorry if I made you feel—like, I mean, _if_ I made you sad that I wasn’t— _punctual_. I know how much you hate people who aren’t punctual.”

Eva reaches up to wipe away the tear before it could trickle down her cheek. “No,” she says, “it’s okay. The only thing that matters is that you’re here _now_. It’s the only thing I could have wished for.”

The double meaning of the words don’t need an explanation. Eva just stands there looking at Chris and watching him stare at her right back. Nothing in the room matters in that moment and the sound of the surrounding have died down to a muffled pulsating buzz. It’s just the two of them standing there among the indistinct fuzziness rushing past them.

“Miss Eva,” Chris says, breaking the silence with a nervous smile, offering the giant bouquet of flowers to her with both hands outstretched. “Would you do me the honour of being my date for tonight, and for every night from now on?”

Eva swallows the lump in her throat. Her hands taking the flowers being offered to her and her eyes finally finding Chris’s after she’s looked at all the variety of different coloured roses in her arms. “Yes,” she says, “I would be honoured to, Mr. Chris.”

Chris beams at her answer, turning on his heel and offering an elbow for her to link her arm in.

Eva does so gladly and they leave the club together that night and forever.

It was the club that brought them together and it was the club that finally made them whole; but it had done its duty and this time it was up to Chris and Eva to figure everything out for themselves. It wasn’t going to be easy and it wasn’t going to be without their bumps in the road, but it was a path they were determined to traverse together and for that moment, that was enough.

Eva and Chris weren’t perfect people; they had their frayed edges and their chipped sides but somehow, being together, their presence in each other’s lives made them people who were truly whole.

 

**THE END.**

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on tumble [@reivenesque](http://reivenesque.tumblr.com/)


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